A Mantra for Moving Forward

Presently, as I write this, I sit in a place of change - not just a hypnosis office, but within my own changes. Life is about to accelerate (in good ways). As things progress, I will keep you posted. But for now, there are times when I find myself exhilarated. Then there are times when it begins to seem a bit overwhelming. It is during these moments, that I feel my humanity all too well. The refuge seems to be in accepting that change is inevitable. The more one fights it, the worse it gets. The more one just lets go, the more the journey unfurls with grace and a certain sense of peace. This later also allows for one to look at change through a positive frame of mind and make choices accordingly.

So, I will share my personal mantra with you for this week's contemplation.

Each step is a step forward into a place of learning, inspiration, and positive evolution.

Enjoy!

Photography by Michel Clair

Contemplating a Summer Vacation

I did not go to Boston this year. In fact, I have only ever been in Boston twice, once for an impromptu vacation and once I flew in to go to a hypnosis convention in Marlborough, Mass. It is time again to think of heading back up there for the said convention (and maybe staying for awhile as there are so many things to do in Boston). Due to other commitments, I probably won't go this year, but all the paper work that has arrived in the mail for it, has me remembering my time in this part of New England.

Both times that I went, I traveled alone, not having any idea of what to expect. I was full of anticipation and not to mention, just a little anxiety. The first trip was the first time I had ever traveled to a city on vacation by myself and it took an effort to force myself to carry out my travel plans, but in the end, I had a grand adventure (I will always think fondly of Lowell, Mass. and their summer festival), enjoyed the Boston Museum of Fine Arts and connected with people I would not have known otherwise. The second trip (to the convention) was the same, though I had a grueling schedule planned that did not really include leaving the hotel. Both were extremely empowering.

This leads me to this week's contemplation.

Think about a time in your life when you planned to do something (positive), but had a bit of apprehension. See if you can remember that feeling - of spreading your wings in way you may not have ever done before. The wings open, fluttering, and you step off the ledge and find yourself staying in the air and then you soar. Think about this positive time, how you felt when you followed through with your plans. Perhaps you felt s sense of completion, a connection, or an adventure well traveled. Fill your mind, body, and spirit with all the good feelings from the experience. Hold onto them for awhile, letting them recharge you, maybe even inspire you. Tell yourself you can re-expereince this wonderful feeling anytime you desire. It is yours.

And with that said...if I have inspired you to travel, you can learn about things to do in San Francisco or many places from Trusted Tours & Attractions and their online travel guides. You can also sign up for their newsletter, giving you an opportunity to win win a $150 iTunes Gift Card.

Feeling Your Fullness

In looking back over comments that my weigh loss clients have mentioned, many often speak of wanting to "fill the void." They eat so as to not feel empty. But they are not the only one's who feel this void and may do things to fill it that are not particularly healthy. Some get into relationships that are best not experienced. Some use various substances that ultimately lead to addiction. Perhaps as you read this, you are thinking that you understand. Maybe you have felt your own void? If you do not feel the void, I will not define it for you - you don't need suggestions so that you will feel it.

For this week's contemplation, we will address the void (a bit).

When you are ready, take a deep breath in and exhale. Then contemplate and say to yourself the next sentence:

I am a vessel of goodness, intelligence, beauty (and any other positive trait you want to add). I am filled with peace and compassion. I am full. I overflow.

Shall We Dance?

Shall we dance? No, not you and I, but that feeling inside that you currently feel? I am asking the wonderful feeling to tango. I am asking that horrid feeling or the fear to waltz. Only rather than leading the feeling through numerous dance steps, a few mental steps are all that are needed.

• Step 1. Allow whatever it is that you are feeling to become conscious thought. If it helps, close your eyes just begin paying attention to the way you feel. Even feeling "nothing" is too feel something.



• Step 2. Take a few deep breathes and release them. Maybe you will notice after taking and exhaling this breath you feel a little different. Breathing can have a profound effect.



• Step 3. Now concentrate on these words this week:
  
  My feelings come and go. I release the negative and savor the positive.

Creating a Better Temperature for Yourself

With the weather fluctuating so much, it is difficult to maintain a comfortable temperature. It seems like the hotter it gets, the hotter tempers grow as well. Patience goes down and everything seems so much harder.

This week's contemplation is all about creating a comfortable place for yourself mentally. When things get hot or even the opposite, too frigid, this little affirmation may give you a few moments to pause and create an inner mental temperature that allows relief.

When you are ready and a have a few moments to yourself, close your eyes, take a deep breath, releasing it when you are ready, and say these words to yourself:

For this moment, I allow myself to go beyond the temperature. I am in a comfortable place where there is peace and calm.

Allow any images that bring comfort to remain in your mind as long as you like, letting go of thoughts of discomfort.

To learn more about how to use the Monday Contemplation, click here.

Reactions are Everything Contemplation

I learned a lot about pain this weekend - physical pain. Don't get me wrong, I have been in pain many times before, but this time I paid a lot of attention to how it made me want to react towards others. Though it was a trivial type of pain, blisters on my toes thanks to new inserts I put in my boots, my feet felt like pins were being jabbed into me with every step. My patience lessened, as did my inner charity towards others. I spent a great deal of time keeping my outer perception calm and not letting my pain be the cause of injury to someone else. That takes so much energy. So, I could not help but think about the people who live with chronic pain on a daily basis. It is one thing to theorize about their pain, but when you have something that causes you great discomfort, you begin to understand the ramifications of managing pain. Life does become so much harder. It permeates everything.

Short of a hypnosis session or two or whatever your pain release pleasure may be, I am not sure a weekly contemplation is going to ebb much of the pain. But, pain or not, how we react to others is very important. We can spread our pain just through attitude or we can chose to work on manging it, not spreading it and perhaps we will find some of it does dissipate, as nothing will be compounded on top of it.

So, for this week's contemplation:

My reactions are my own. I have the strength and the power to control them. When I do this well, I am a better person.

How to Use the Monday Contemplations

Contemplation - a deep, reflective thought.

To start out the new week, for each week, day, hours, minute and second, we have the opportunity to set our our mind frame for creating a positive tone. Even if we find ourselves drifting away from it, we can return any time we like.

Here is how it works:

• Take a few moments of quiet time and read the Monday contemplation to yourself. If it seems helpful to you or resonates, then feel free to use it. If it does not seem helpful, you might one to try a past Monday contemplation or create one of your own.



• When you are familiar with the words of the contemplation, take a few cleansing breathes and focus on the words.



• Maybe you run them through your mind, quietly saying them to yourself for a little while or maybe it is just the notion that stays with you.



• When it feels like you are focused on it, allow the thoughts to drift across your mind.



• Maybe other thoughts come to mind. Allow those that are not helpful to pass, but for those that do seem helpful, just take note of them. It may give you a clue to something deeper within you that you should address.



• Still focusing on the contemplation, think about how it applies to you.



• Think about why it applies and visualize or think about the idea of a positive you.



• Allow all your thoughts to be positive before you take another deep breath and open your eyes.



• Set a time each day to repeat the process.
  

There are also other ways to utilize the contemplation. These may include:

• Writing about the contemplation and letting the words flow (like free association).



• Creating an artistic piece that is inspired by the contemplation.



• Even talking about it with a friend or love one may be helpful.

A Priceless Contemplation

As the Internet seemingly becomes more and more about rankings and ratings, it is easy to lose ourselves - to believe we are the sum of scores that others have given us. Our emotions fluctuate between ecstatic and morose based on a random number or comment (heck, out comments can also be judged). We can get lost in popularity contests and someone else's negativity.

But we are more than that number or someone else's opinion. We are flesh and blood, thoughts and emotions. We are ourselves and all the ratings and such, do not equal our sum. Even if we have all good comments, all good numbers, we are more than those.

So, with this idea, here is the contemplation for the week:

I am the sum of all that I am and I am priceless.

Photo By Dan Ionut Popescu

A Movie Mantra

About a week ago, I finally saw the movie The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen. I know, I am way behind the times, and no, I am not going to give you a movie review. Instead, there was a motif that caught my attention and I have pondered it many times since seeing the movie. One of the characters, the wise and sage Allan Quatermain, teaches his young disciple Tom Sawyer how to shoot properly. His advice is simple: take your time. You have all the time you need to do what you need to do (or something close to that).

Since seeing that movie, whenever I have begun to feel rushed, that thought comes into my mind. I take a breath, think to myself, "take your time" and the feeling of being rushed dissipates. Even when others try to rush me, the "take your time mantra" has worked. It seems to work as a block to whatever negativity is causing the feelings; whether it is mine own or if I am picking up those thoughts from others.

So this week, I offer you these words for contemplation:

Breath. All the time I need is available to me. I do things at my own pace.

Freedom of the Road Contemplation

The quote that I always use to represent myself is:

A road not traveled is an adventure not had.

For anyone who has spent any time with me, you may know of my love for side-winding travel and such. I am the kind of person who, now after years of humanity, hesitate a tad and consider things before I take that "road." I have learned that the road can be a good decision or one that in the end, after plentiful, proverbial flat tires, stalled motors, or harrowing experiences, is always an opportunity for learning.

So, this week's contemplation is about looking back at some of the roads we have traveled. Are there roads we have taken that we may have wished we driven past? Unable to erase that particular trip, what did we learn from it? Good or bad?

Now, take a deep breath in and release it when you are ready. Close your eyes and contemplate the following:

All my roads have led me here. This is my time and place. Now I am free to chose my next road.

A Traveling Contemplation

Do you ever feel like you are stuck in one place? Maybe it is a mental thing or perhaps even physical? Maybe it is a rut or the pain of loss? Or maybe just every now and then you like to get away.

Today's contemplation is about traveling to a place other than where you are by mental means. Perhaps you envision a place you would like to be or even a state of mind. Allow thoughts of this place, preferably a peaceful or positive one, to fill your thoughts.

So, take a deep breath and exhale. Then think to yourself:

I am free. I can go anywhere my mind will allow me to go. I open the door and I am there.

Contemplating Another Religion

For today's contemplation, I am actually going to direct you elsewhere. I know, I know, but with Wesak upon us, there is much more to be gained than what I can offer today. So I send you on to download three different audios (not mine). They discuss what Wesak is all about and how to utilize the positive energy of the day productively.

The first is the Wesak Legend Meditation, Part 1 (3:35)

The second is Part II. (5:16)

And here is an audio about Wesak itself.(1:38)

Please note that this is the more New Age version of this event. It is a little religious, but I am sharing this with you as an entrance into how other people think about things. It is all in the quest for being open-minded. N*tranced does not endorse any particular religious faith or spiritualism.

These audios are from souledout.org, which is an outreach ministry of Safe Space.

A Cleansing Contemplation

Continuing on with my Monday Contemplations, I am going to be a bit more vague in the wording. I am still working on the idea of healing grief, but I want to allow those who are not sad a chance to enjoy the imagery.

Cliches are coming to mind today - such as "in every life a little rain must fall" (strange weather, you know) or "with every door that closes, a new one opens." Most people tend to cringe at cliches, but they can be extremely helpful because it means so many people relate to it.

So, breathe deeply and enjoy:

I open the door of my mind and allow the rain to wash away that which hinders me.

Begining to Release Loss Contemplation

Loss is the subject of today's contemplation. We have all lost things we have cared about that are no longer with us, whether it was someone leaving or losing something material. The effects are always hard and sad. Perhaps we look back and think about ways we could have prevented the loss. Maybe we regret. Maybe we need to take better care of what we do have or maybe it was inevitable. Very little last forever.

Though the next few Monday's will deal with loss, the contemplations, as always, seek to uplift you and give you a positive focus to carry through your week. So, even if you are not suffering from the pangs of loss, the words will still be beneficial.

This week's contemplation is about the old cliche: If you love something set it free. But we will stop there. I do not necessarily mean this literally. Indoor cat owners, don't let you cat out. Don't let your children run rampant without supervision and so forth. In thinking about the idea of loss and that which is gone, before it can get better, you have to accept the loss and that it is gone.

Take a deep breath in and release it at your own pace. Now focus on the pain of the loss. Yes, it will hurt, but the key here is to focus on it, not blaming, not regretting, not holding it in, but letting it be. Allow it to soften. Give it space. It is okay to be sad about it. It is okay to mourn. Then, when you are ready, allow your focus to concentrate on something deeper than the loss. Focus on what is gone, but in a way that is not possessive. Think of all the good things about that person or thing. There has to be something or the loss would not affect you as it has. Separate the thing that is lost from yourself and let it exist as it is, on its own. Just because it maybe out of your possession, does not mean it has lost its own value. It is still beautiful. It is free. You are free. Allow both the object and yourself to be free. Know that your grief too will pass if you allow it.

Breathe.

And now focus on the following:

In my hand I hold beauty. It has connected with me, touched me. I open my hand and it floats away on the wind. Beautiful. Free. I am free.

Your Space

I spent Friday on travel and most of it in a hotel in the suburban sprawl. After isolating myself there for the day and working on papers and such, I noticed a slight depression creeping in upon me. Not even opening the curtains for the bright sunlight helped or even the short walk through strip mall paradise. But then the next day when I left to continue my journey, and ended up in a small town proper in Mississippi, the load was lightened and everything felt okay again. Just changing locations was huge (I do not live in suburbia, so it was a change). The town was quiet and it was raining, but there was a feeling of hope and dreams.

So this leads me into today's contemplation. Look around you, in the place you spend the most amount of time. Is this a good place for you? What are the positive aspects? Do there need to be more (or maybe less)?

Contemplate where you are physically. Close your eyes for a moment, take a few deep breaths and just let the idea of the space around come into your mind. As it does, notice how you feel? Are you comfortable, depressed, happy, sad? Does it feel right and what needs to happen so it do so? Allow the answers to come from deep within. Then when you are ready just focus on the following statement:

I have the power to create a space around me that helps me be where I want to be.

Accepting the Struggle Contemplation

The peaceful weekend has lead to this beautiful Monday morning. There is a quietness to the day, and I am hoping to hold onto that for awhile.

Over the weekend, I received a comment asking me about how to deal with trauma triggers. I am currently working on the answer for that (perhaps a tip for Tuesday?) and have contemplated it. That led me into thoughts of what to post for this week's contemplation.

In Jack Kornfield's book A Path with Heart, he mentions the idea of learning about the "war within." These would be things that you may struggle against. They could be big things, general worries, or even minor irritations. In fact, a lot of the time, we do not even know what it is that we struggle against. We feel the side effects - tension, stress, ill-health, or even a feeling of depression.

So this week, take a few minutes out of your day, begin to quiet the mind, and ask your inner self:

What is it that you struggle against?

The trick is not to dwell on this, not to think about it, but just let the thoughts enter your mind. In other words, do not force them, let your subconscious mind bring the ideas forward.

Once it does this, ask yourself if the answer rings true. If it does not, let the idea go. But if it does resonate within you, you can do a couple of things. You can chose to just accept that this as something you struggle against and the awareness may make it easier to bear. Or you can contemplate it more, you can ask what is you struggle against exactly and why. Can you rectify it or deal with it differently.

And no matter what it is, this is only for you to know, you do not have to share it. Even if it seem silly, do not discredit it. The more you can identify issues, the more you can deal with them.

Being Productive, Being Rewarded Contemplation

I have spent the morning reading blogs, answering email, and getting ready for the week. I am mostly guilty of reading other people's blogs. It is endlessly fascinating, but I do have to get to work eventually. This has led me to the path of this week's contemplation.

Think about the concepts that may cause you not to do the things you know you need to do - be it playing video games, reading, another cup of coffee please, or just chatting with co-workers. Granted, we all need to do these things occasionally, but do they ever get in the way of what you need to get done?

If so, think about what it is that you are doing that is disruptive of your time. Is it something you enjoy? If so, maybe it would be good to use it as a reward. If you get whatever you need to do done or to a certain point, then indulge for a set period of time.

So here is the contemplation:

I am productive and positive. When I am happy with the outcome of what I need to do, I am free to (insert the reward here). Only when I have accomplished what I need to accomplish, do I deserve to (insert reward here).

It is All Relative

There is a cliche that says "You are only as old as you feel." Personally, I cringe at this. Physically, if I have not gotten enough sleep or have eaten badly, I feel much older than I really am. I know several who agree with this.

But the statement holds some wisdom whether we like it or not. There are people who are in their 90s who are by far more active than people in their 30s, and I marvel at the former. So, perhaps it is the idea that relativity is a strange fountain of youth or a mechanism of longevity.

On the flip side, it is possible that if you are as old as you feel, you can use this to increase your self-esteem - say if you feel really immature, you can work on maturity to feel older and wiser.

So, this week's contemplation is all about age. Ready yourself for a few quiet moments and think about what is your ideal age and why. Just let the answers come without self-criticism or censor. When you have a few thoughts about this, then contemplate on the following:

I am as old as I want to be and my mind can help manifest this so I look, feel, and act that age.

Time for Contemplation

Well, time got away from me and here I am on a Tuesday, posting a Monday Contemplation. Better late than never, right? And what-they-heck, it changes things up once in while.

Since I am late in posting this, I will use the idea to inspire the weekly contemplation.

Beginning the quieting process, allow your mind to focus on the idea of time. Does it go on forever, slowly, so slowly, passing by or does it speed by, gone before you know it?

Here is the contemplation:

Time is a rhythm and I move at my own pace.

Notice how this statement affects you. If you feel rushed all the time or that life is happening too slowly, realize you are the keeper of your own time. It is okay to take control of it.

A Sacrifice

Whether you are into the Easter story or not, with it looming on the horizon of the week, it provides a nice background theme. Specifically, I am talking about the idea of sacrifice. Sacrifice can be difficult but it can also be freeing. It all depends on the mind set.

Something I do each year is a form of sacrifice. On the years that I celebrate Mardi Gras, I participate in my own version of Lent. I give up something that is hard. When I slip up, I save a dollar, letting it accumulate until Easter. Then I donate those dollars to charity. Usually, I give up word habits (so it is easy to slip). For instance, last year I gave up the word "excellent." I used it all the time, especially as an affirmation that I was listening to others. It is an odd sacrifice for sure, giving up a security-blanket word, but it always feels good to donate to a favorite clause. It is also a great way to curb bad habits.

So for today's contemplation - think about the idea of sacrifice. Have you given up something that felt like a sacrifice? Are you currently doing so? Is there something you would like to give up that seems like it would be a sacrifice? If so, ask yourself why you did, should, or would give it up. Center on the positive aspects of the sacrifice. Now say to yourself:

By making this sacrifice, I am free.